Haiku #39: Self-Diagnosis

How can one tell if

One is depressed if one is 

So often happy? 


I Found This in One of My Old Notebooks

“I’m done. I’m done with the frustration and doubt and moping and excuses. I’m done blaming it all on writer’s block. I’m undecided on whether writer’s block actually exists. But at the moment I feel more like I have a bad case of soul black. Something’s off and I can’t put my finger on it. And I’m allowing it to strip away one of the most fundamental parts of myself. So now I have to fight for it. I’ve come to grips with the fact that it’s not going to be as easy as when I was twelve. I no longer have the stamina or the time to sit and write for hours. But the passion is still there. I want to write these stories more than anything. I want to build worlds and destroy them so that my characters have something to fight for. I want to create characters that last. I want to create worlds that people get lost in. It’s not going to be easy. But that’s alright with me. I never asked for easy. Easy isn’t fulfilling.”